Saturday, February 16, 2013

Sparkly Saturday Inspiration

Today’s Sparkly Saturday Prompt:

Sparkle Gratitude Who/what inspires us to have a Sparkly Saturday

Sometimes I don’t feel very sparkly. Sometimes I need to find some sparkle outside of my world. When I see other sparkly beings spreading their own brand of light in the world, the sparkle that is within me is awakened. Sometimes that’s all it takes. Other times I need to play. Here are some of my favorite sources for sparkle rejuvenation.

1. Sleep

That’s right, sleep. There’s nothing that revives me like a good nap.

2. My family

Sometimes the responsibilities of family tire me out (think grocery shopping, errands, laundry, etc.), but my family also know me better than anyone. This knowledge leads to the amazingly sweet ways that they support me every day.

3. The amazing websites and blogs of inspiring people.

I posted some of my favorites in my Beacons of Light post. I’d like to add to that list:

Yota Schneider - The Art of Pausing: A Woman's Way of Untangling Herself

Koralee - Bluebird Notes

4. Pinterest

If you haven’t tried Pinterest beware! You will find that hours pass by without your realizing it. When I feel my spirits sag, half an hour on pinterest will fill my heart with beauty and excitement. Sometimes I even leave with an idea to act upon myself. What I love about Pinterest is the ability to bookmark images and come back to them.

5. Snapeee

Snapeee is an iTunes app for picture editing and sharing. I have recently taken up using it. I find it really enjoyable to be able to add sparkle to my photos and share them through Snapeee and on my blog as well. It is based in Japan and has users from around the world making it a great way for me to have practice reading Japanese doing an activity I enjoy. (You don’t have to read Japanese to use this app.) While I am literally adding sparkle to my photos, I am also being charged up by the beautiful photos shared by others.

6. My hair stylist

It took a long time for me to find the right hair stylist when I moved to this area. I nearly gave up. I’m so glad I found her. Each month when I visit her I am always inspired by the way she creates sparkle around her and invites others to join in.

7. A cup of tea

You knew it, didn’t you? A cup of tea does so much to revive me. The slowing down and drinking it slowly while I slow my thinking down too. This act helps me to push away all the extraneous thoughts and focus on just the task at hand. Magic.

I know this list is incomplete. I am afraid it might not be the best I have to offer, but I will offer it in its imperfectness because it is Sparkly Saturday. I know that I have the opportunity to keep writing.

Don't forget to join my Sparkly Saturday Conspirators:

Emmy Blue : Children's entertainer and writer who tells her own magical tales and spreads sparkling enchantments all over the Pacific Northwest

Yota Schneider : Seasons of Change Master Coach * Writer * Speaker * Retreats Facilitator * Mindfulness Meditation Practitioner * Mom * Wife * Friend * Ever striving gardener and finder of beauty and peace in the little things

KatWB.com: This is An Online Holistic Arts Center created by Kat WB! Enjoy virtual classes, holistic coaching, a holistic blog, KatWB TV and resources for nutrition, sustainability & self-help.

Saturday, February 9, 2013

Spreading Sparkles

Today's Sparkle Saturday could also be called "Sparkly Snow Saturday."

Before I can explain my thoughts on sharing sparkles with others, I need to put down several of my central thoughts.

Everyone wants to feel valued.
Everyone wants to feel cared for.
Everyone wants to feel they make a difference.
The person who listens is the most popular and valuable person around.

One of the most powerful ways to share sparkles is to LISTEN.

Most people want to talk. Most people want to be heard. There is job security for the friend who is a good listener. Few people compete for the spot. Develop your powers of listening, of asking leading questions to illicit conversation and you will be valued. More than that, you will hear stories about things outside of your experience and your world will broaden.

Frankly I know this from observing my mother. I'm certainly not a talented listener myself. Mom is the best listener I know. She has always maintained that by asking the right questions, she can hear very interesting stories. She already knows the stories she has to tell.

I am not by nature a good listener. I have suffered under the illusion that I am an interesting person with stories that other people must want to hear. This is part of what drives me as a writer. It is an advantage to have this belief when you are in the act of writing, but it doesn’t get you much in terms of material or in understanding the human heart. When writing nonfiction it is all the more important to listen and gather information. Focusing on our own selves gets in the way.

As a novice listener, I am often guilty of the mistake of thinking that making connections means that hearing the story of someone who lost their shoe should be the intro to my even funnier story of the time I lost a shoe. While sharing stories around a theme can be fun and be delightful for everyone, there is another way to share sparkles.

I have spent the week thinking about this and gathering a list of tips for better listening. I have gathered this for my own use, not as a list of things I can tell you because I am so skilled at them. I have a long way to go. I will share them with you.

Tips for active listening:

Try to stop yourself from thinking about what you will say next and really listen to the person in front of you.
Clarify. If you are not sure you understand, ask.
Remember to use the five W words to get more information – Who did you turn to for help? What did you do then? Where did you hear about it? When did this happen? Why did you decide to start bungee jumping? How did it make you feel?
Help extend their tale telling by asking questions. What else did you see while you were there? Are there any more like it? What are the experiences that you remember most from your time there?
Turn the subject when your speaker seems to be pained by the memory. Find some tangential aspect of the story to tell your own and then apologize for taking over the conversation. This is a great time for you to tell that story you were dying to tell a little while earlier.
Don’t wait for your speaker to bring up a topic. Ask questions. I have a student who likes to come and help me. An awkward silence developed one day so I started asking the party game questions – favorite color, food, etc. I found out that he has a passion for cooking and we ended up sharing recipes. The time we spend together has become so much more productive because we know more about each other.

My favorite question to ask?

Would you like some more tea?

What are your tips for being a better listener?

For more sparkle visit:

Saturday, February 2, 2013

I Sparkle - Taking Time for Tea

Some years ago Saturday was a day to get up early and be the driver for activities or classes. No sleeping in for me. Once I got up and around and delivered my charges to their appointed places I was free for a few hours. Not at home, mind you, but my time was mine to do with as I chose. At the time I taught a graduate course, so I chose to spend the time at a coffee shop drinking tea (ironic, isn’t it?) reading, writing, coordinating or correcting.

I discovered fiction writing and changed my focus. The weekly routine of writing grounded my whole week. I no longer have a regular Saturday chauffer gig. I drive on a more per diem basis at this point.

I have gotten so used to anticipating my Saturday morning tea and pen that I really miss it when I don’t get it.

These days I rarely leave home for my tea. Instead I make a pot just the way I like it. I make a ritual of gathering beautiful tea things together. That first sip is a balm – the cares of the week slip away.

When I first began having tea it seemed like a lot of work, yet it’s not more work than a regular breakfast if you have the things just as handy. It happened gradually for me. I started trading heavy mugs with humorous sayings for china teacups with floral patterns. I added silver flatware from a flea market. Each piece brings a happy memory. Each cup is a reunion. Slowly, my tea things shifted to easier to reach places while other items, less used though more mainstream in appearance, were moved to the back.

By moving these precious things to the front I’m declaring my own importance, my own value.

I drink my cup slowly, savoring the moment.

After my tea time I’m more relaxed and ready to face the world. I’m more cheerful and I’d even bet that I have less wrinkles. If I get my cup of tea, I’m willing to bend my will toward the desires of others. Without it, I’m more likely to feel disgruntled when things don’t go as planned.

Some people might think that it’s the caffeine that is working the miracles. I have other thoughts on the matter. While I enjoy a cup of tea from a Styrofoam cup on the go as much as the next person, it does not refresh or renew me. At least, it doesn’t do it all by itself. Rather, the act of preparing a beautiful pot of tea has come to be a signal that I am about to slow down, clear my head of the extraneous and have some time inside my own head. My focus begins before I take my first sip. I make a conscious effort to push everything else out of my thoughts and make use of the time. I don’t use the time to pay bills or straighten up the room. The time I have for tea may be the only time I have to write, to create, to fill up my creative self. Believe me when I say that I dive in.

It is difficult for me to clear my mind. I have never been successful at sitting in meditation and clearing out all thoughts. When I make a pot of tea, however, it is often easy for me to banish all the static and focus on my self-renewal.

It takes relatively little time to prepare my tea tray. It takes a lot longer to drink it. I take a sip. I scribble madly in a notebook, on a napkin on my laptop. Drinking a cup of tea takes much longer than eating a meal. It is a time of letting go. It is a time of declaration. It is a time of renewal.

Sparkly Saturdays? For me, they start with tea.

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